If there is one thing I have learned in my years as a mother and a wife is that comparison is a joy killer and thief. That hunt for approval to boost your self-esteem is everywhere you turn, it is almost unavoidable. Those turns almost always lead to a dead end.
I hear you and see you when we become overwhelmed with tasks and our seemingly mundane lives. It's easy to think your neighbor down the road has all of her ducks in a row and is rocking this thing called life. If we are being honest, somewhere she is struggling, she may just be better at hiding it. No one is perfect. Let's face it social media doesn't help in this area either. We are seeing everyone highlight reel, not the real raw deal.
I thought I would share some ways I have been able to break free from the trap of comparison.
Self Care: This was a big one for me. I started taking better care of myself. I work out, I eat a much cleaner diet and I rest. I used to make excuses that I didn't have the time for this. All it took was a simple conversation with my husband. He started driving our daughter to dance when I need him to and that helped me fit in ME time. You can not pour into others if your cup is empty. Start small, any little bit helps. My mood is much improved and I gain self-esteem from validating myself and not by having others validate me. 3 John 1:2 says, Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well.
Complimenting And Building Up Others: This is another area that has been impactful for me. Instead of being envious and letting it stew and become a hater, I started calling out things I loved about people. If I thought it I would say it, either by texting emailing or saying it to them directly. I honestly try to compliment someone each day. It can be as simple as, I love your shirt. This doesn't even have to be to people you know. 99.9 percent of the time you receive a smile or a thank you and for a brief moment in time you shift the attention off of yourself onto another. If you notice something you love about someone say it! I promise it will bless you as much as it blesses the other person. Hebrews 10:24 says Let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works.
I challenge you this week to take a step toward working on your well being as well as complimenting someone else. I would love to hear about your stories and encounters this week as they happen.
- Lori Kardos